How do you celebrate someone's birthday who's no longer there?


On January the 18th my daughter Lucy would have turned 26.

How do you celebrate the birthday of someone who is no longer walking this earth?

Who will be 25 forever?

I find some comfort in Donna Ashworth's poem: 'Don't miss me more'.

Don't miss me more by Donna Ashworth

‘Don’t miss me more than once a day, 

For life is moving fast. 

Don’t wish all of your time away, 

Dreaming of the past. 


Don’t waste the moment looking at, 

The things I left behind me. 

I’m not within those walls or boxes 

The heart is where you’ll find me. 

Don’t dread to say my name, sweet one, 

Don’t fear the wrath of sadness. 

Just take the love you had for me, 

And turn it into gladness. 


Don’t worry when my birthday comes 

Don’t feel me missing more. 

I’m filled with love you’re sending me, 

Just as I was before. Some days your anger will rush out, 

Your tears will find their way. 

To me, wherever I am then. 

I’ll soothe them all away. 


When I am gone don’t miss me more, 

Than once, or twice a day. 

There’s so much life to live, my love. 

I’m with you, all the way.’ 

Donna Ashworth - Loss.

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